| Wednesday, March 1st, 2006 | By Kristen DiPaolo | Connect With Kids Network Producer |
“There are things that are acceptable in college that aren’t acceptable anywhere else. If we had a 35-year-old man at a Christmas party funneling beers, we’d be appalled. But you go to a fraternity house and you’ve got kids funneling beer, and that’s sort of the norm.”
– Heather Hayes, LPC, Licensed Professional Counselor
According to research from Harvard University, every year more than 14-hundred college students die because of alcohol poisoning, drunk driving, dangerous pranks, and other risky behaviors. And according to another study, almost half of those student fatalities are freshmen.
For some students, that first year in college is one long party.
“Sex, skipping class, not taking their education seriously,” observes 20-year-old Scott Wilson about freshman life.
“Club-hopping, bar-hopping,” adds 21-year-old Nicholas Phung.
“Certain people that I know definitely have a lot of casual sex,” says 22-year-old Nikki Rhodes, “like, two-three times a week with different people.”
Experts say some freshmen can’t handle their newfound freedom. They skip class, get into credit card debt, and binge drink.
“There are things that are acceptable in college that aren’t acceptable anywhere else,” says Heather Hayes, a licensed professional counselor. “If we had a 35-year-old man at a Christmas party funneling beers, we’d be appalled. But you go to a fraternity house and you’ve got kids funneling beer, and that’s sort of the norm.”
So how can parents prepare high school students to handle the freedom of college?
“One thing that you can do is, in their [high school] senior year or in the summer before they go off to school, give them a nice transition period,” says Dr. Ken Carter, an assistant professor of psychology at Emory University’s Oxford College. “If you’ve had some rules in the house, in terms of curfew, to sort of back-up on those a little bit.”
Dr. Carter says most schools offer courses to teach freshman how to be safe. “There is evidence that students who take those freshman seminar courses end up more well-adjusted, stay in school longer, and sometimes even have better grades.”
Finally, he says, there are no magic words, no single talk you can have, with your kids, before they leave for college.
“It’s all those years that you have been there, and helped them and instilled them with values - that’s what is going to be important,” says Dr. Carter. So rather than telling them what not to do, it’s probably better to remind them of what your hopes are for their behaviors.”