Make Room for Daddy

Does a man with a good career make for a bad father? According to the Fatherhood Initiative, that’s the message on television shows. The group recently surveyed prime time sit-coms and dramas finding that most shows portrayed fathers as either successful or involved with their kids, but not both.

Real life dads are shattering the myth. They say work and family are not mutually exclusive. Successful dads can have a big impact on a child’s life.

Dad’s teach tough and competitive play as well as risk-taking. Studies show a dad’s sink or swim manner can actually stretch a child emotionally, teaching them to rely on themselves and aggressively navigate the outside world.

“When they have to sort of confront their own difficult emotions maybe thrill or fear, it’s more of a growing experience than with a more quiet, nurturing parenting style,” says pediatrician, Dr. Karen Dewling.

While the Fatherhood Initiative suggests that television portrays fathers that are more competent as less involved. Real life fathers say the opposite is often true. Competent dads often lead the way in teaching kids how to take on the outside world.

Mom vs. Dad

Mothers and fathers do things differently and research shows even babies know that difference right from the beginning. Six week old babies react differently to dad’s touch and manner. Some distinguishing daddy characteristics that help a child thrive include:

Discipline – Dads often emphasize how the outside world will respond to bad behavior while moms focus on internal emotions.

Risk-taking – Many dads will give kids more room to try new things and even fail without offering support as quickly as mom.

Physical Play – Fathers tend to rough house with their children more than moms. When playing with dads, kids stretch their bodies more and stimulate their minds with more active kinds of play.

Experts say in some ways fathers push children to cope with the world outside their mothers nurturing safety zone. Fathering behavior can also help kids develop what some call “emotional communication” skills” teaching them to read others emotions and regulate their own.