Comeback Kids
For decades psychologists have studied why kids go wrong. Now, experts say we can learn more from kids who despite tremendous odds turn out alright.
Research shows that kids who survive aren’t just lucky or born to win. Rather, significant adults like parents, teachers, volunteers and even friends can help build resilience and teach kids to successfully navigate the turning points in life.
It’s called resilience. Until recently, experts thought resilience was an inborn trait predisposed by factors like high IQ and sunny disposition. But research now shows that resiliency can be fostered and molded. The most important factor is a caring adult.
“They need to have somebody to love them,” says Bernadette Leite, M.Ed., an educator with the Emory University School of Public Health.
Leite, who is conducting research on how to raise resilient kids, says a number of factors build resilience including involved parents, good schools, good friends, and extracurricular activities; but, a caring adult is one of the most influential factors in determining whether a child will be able to overcome obstacles.
An attentive adult can help a child headed for prison instead march toward high school graduation and a future through ROTC
Fourteen year old James once spent his afternoons hanging out with a gang. Now he makes good grades and participates in ROTC James says a compassionate mentor made the difference.
“He showed me a way I could make it without falling by the wayside,” says James.
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“They need somebody to love them and when they feel loved they can love themselves.” --Bernadette
Leite, |
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Dr. Rick D’Alli, a child psychiatrist at Johns Hopkins University, says three major factors determine a child’s resilience: Temperament. A child that is easygoing and has a friendly disposition is more likely to respond well to challenges. Social Environment. Good peer groups, caring neighborhoods, good schools and involvement in extracurricular activities can provide support and help a child be more resilient. Loving and Consistent Caregivers. Caregiver means the person who spends the most time providing love and support for a child. Even if parents are unavailable, kids can survive if a loving adult leads the way. |
What Parents and Caring Adults Can Do:
Be a positive influence. Researchers say the positive influence of parents, relatives, schools, volunteers and mentors can help kids navigate the inevitable risks and turning points of growing up.
Take time to care. Behind every resilient kid you will find a caring adult, or several adults, who took the time to offer guidance, love and support.
Beat the odds. Experts say that good parenting can overpower the negative influences of bad neighborhoods, poverty, and crime.
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Resources
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Additional
Information Stress, Risk, and Resilience in Child Adolescence,
Boys and
Girls Clubs of America |
For
more information on parenting issues contact us: Connecting with Kids |